Here’s the patter I usually use to precede the fabulous Brian Lasser song Another Year:
“Last August I was in Costco and I found myself standing in an aisle, hyperventilating and screaming ‘No, no, no.’ You see, they had put out the holiday merchandise. Not by Thanksgiving, or Halloween, but two weeks before Labor Day! Ron turned to me and said, ‘You’re getting in the holiday mood early this year.’ And don’t tell me, ‘oh, just ignore it.’ You have to deal with it then, otherwise they run out of the good French-wired ribbon. So is it any surprise that by the time the holidays actually get here, I’m absolutely drained of holiday spirit? Standing outside Macy’s window, etc…”
Ron and I were in Costco tonight, and sure enough, the holiday selection of French-wired ribbon is out. I managed to walk past the display calmly without getting any, or even stopping to check out this year’s selection.